The curious case of "intermediate"

Now you may have heard of a TV series or movie called “The Inbetweeners”; I’ve only seen the movie and that decision was made due to time and a lack of other options. I had no idea a TV show existed and it remains unwatched due to the poor quality of my experience with the movie. But if you can put any preconceptions aside for a brief period of time, I’d like to introduce you to a possibly more meaningful form of “middleman.”

immigrants

I was born in South Korea, but Australia became all I know as my family immigrated there shortly after I was born. Not only was I the youngest in the family, but the age difference between my two older brothers and I was great, too great for me to have meaningful ties to either of them. Of course, I was too young at the time to really understand my surroundings, but it seemed like with so much going on, nothing really felt complete. I know this isn’t entirely clear, so I’ll elaborate.

Idiom

Language-wise, the main language my parents spoke was Korean, while they both tried to negotiate English; meanwhile, my brother and sister seemed to easily adopt English while maintaining enough of the Korean they had grown up with (their much older age also meant they had clearer memories of our home country and this also included a stronger cultural identity). . Then there was me: absorbed in English – because that’s what I needed to speak at school, and it was the language that fascinated me in books and on TV – while my parents insisted that I attend Korean language classes, and all through This time, I was trying to find the best way to communicate with my siblings and parents in two different languages. As you may have guessed by now, I ended up developing a hybrid language in addition to English; That’s right, an “in-between”.

Identity

Outside of the inside of the family home, the outside world became an equally hectic experience. Many of the Australians I came across never seemed completely comfortable with a Korean appearance combined with an Australian accent and, in some cases, my increased familiarity with the English language. One particular scenario that played out repeatedly was meeting someone for the first time after an initial phone call; it could have been something as pedestrian as visiting a store to see a product. The intro became a refrain: “You sounded so Australian on the phone I didn’t think it was you!”.

However, upon reflection, it was the constant feeling of “in between” that washed over me. Although I did meet other immigrants, most were second or third generation and Australian-born. Even though they maintained a connection to another culture, they seemed to be able to create a strong sense of cultural identity without any problems. On the other hand, I always found myself fumbling with details, explaining to others the place of my birth, my inability to speak my native language, etc. I always felt “in between” and this can still be frustrating.

In progress

Interestingly, I’m still an “intermediate” even though I now live in an Asian country. It’s not Korea, but even if I had returned to Korea, I’d still be a misfit for the same reasons that applied in Australia: I look Korean, but I sound Australian, I can’t speak Korean, and my cultural understanding is anything but. Korean. I will be a “go-between” wherever I go, and of course I am not alone in a world of continued immigration. So if you are someone who can easily express your cultural identity without any “buts”, maybe think about the “in-betweens” of the world.