domestic violence "tiffany style" – 5 challenges of abused wealthy women
Many people think that it is easier to deal with domestic violence when you are rich. But, the fact is that the wealthy have a whole host of problems unique to their high socioeconomic status that makes dealing with domestic abuse even more difficult.
How is it for the rich woman abused?
1) Disbelief
As they break their silence, a roar erupts, driving them back into hiding. People doubt that they are actually abused. “How can it be?” hear: “Your husband is a pillar in the community.
It can be a doctor, a lawyer, a politician, the clergy of your community… If you serve in these care/healing/protection positions, how the hell can you be an abuser? This dichotomy confuses outsiders who observe wealthy domestic abuse.
Besides, it even confused Google. Try doing a Google search on domestic violence and wealth or money or wealth. These words that connote high socioeconomic status cannot be found in combination with the term “domestic violence” (at least not at the time of writing).
two) no empathy
People retain empathy for the circumstances of abused wealthy women. “You go on an exotic vacation, you live in a nice house, you choose the best of the season…”
The implication here is that you should “turn the tab” on getting slapped and enjoying your wealth. He says that lifestyle is the “price” for putting up with abuse.
3) False claims and re-victimization
When battered wealthy women turn to social services for help, the potential for abuse they endure increases exponentially. It can get buried in play-offs sponsored by payments from its manipulative and abusive partners.
Abusers are known for their ability to manipulate health care providers and law enforcement to make false claims about their victims. It is their way of discrediting the domestic violence survivor and ultimately saving face by getting rid of any responsibility for suspected or documented domestic abuse.
4) Empty Lawful War Chest
When they go to divorce court, all hell can break loose. They can be buried in pleadings on pleadings characteristic of legal stalking in high-profile divorce cases.
Often these battered women appear in family court pro se’ and represent themselves against their battering partner’s legal team. They may even have a list of divorce attorneys on their way once payment can’t come through.
You see, most of the so-called battered rich women have no control over the family’s money. So when the manhunt begins to break the cycle of abuse, the financial spigot is turned off. And they remain at the mercy of their partner’s financial war chest: the resources that define their luxury status in the first place.
Then, when they try to take advantage of the same resources available to their less “financially able” counterparts, it doesn’t get any better. Unfortunately, “wealthy” battered women who approach the public system for legal aid may be told, “We can’t help you because your legal aid needs will exceed our entire annual budget.”
5) the heinous crimes
Unfortunately, these are the domestic violence divorce cases where battered mothers may lose contact with their minor children or have symbolic contact through supervised visitation. These are the survivors of domestic violence who fall through the cracks of the legal system and are left childless, homeless, and penniless.
These are the brave women who thought they had it easier, like everyone else, because of their wealth. And then they recognize that their challenges to ultimately breaking free may leave them again victimized by their partner’s use of family money.
If you are an abused wealthy woman, consider the challenges ahead of you. And be prepared to deal with each and every one of them as you campaign to break the cycle of domestic abuse.