Arranged Marriages: Are They Still Relevant in a Modern World?

Do you want to marry a person you do not know or love? Do you believe in arranged marriage? What are the factors that contribute to parents preferring arranged marriage for their children? There are mixed answers to these questions, some people agreed to such an arrangement because they believed it was the best way to find the right partner, but some refused because they don’t love the person.

Arranged marriage still exists in some countries, such as Kenya, India, the Philippines, China, and some Arab countries. It is the type of marriage arranged by the parents of both parties to avoid the courtship process. In most cases, it is practiced by wealthy and influential families in the communities due to various reasons such as:

• To maintain their status in society.
• Restrict their children from marrying outside their community and social status.
• To ensure the success of their children.

This type of marriage arrangement dates back to the 1500s in Victorian Europe. In ancient Egypt, it was practiced to maintain their royal lineage. Meanwhile, the Romans used it to form strategic alliances and strengthen the military position in the family.

Its concept changed over time as parents are more concerned about the lives of their children before giving their consent to such an arrangement. They believed that marriages can only be successful if their children find their life partners according to their standards and wishes, but some parents still control their children’s lives and choose their partners.

In some cultures, some parents still enforce this type of marriage, but parents create a short list of spouses for their children to choose from. If both parties refuse, the negotiations are cancelled.

Advantage:

• It holds the marriage together because both parties have the same culture, values, and views.
• The wealth, properties and assets of both families remain within the family circle. Family secrets, issues and problems also remain within both families.
• There are no incompatibility issues because parents choose their child’s partner based on compatibility of religious, financial, and educational backgrounds.
• There is a lower divorce rate compared to marriages based on romantic love due to cultural and value compatibility.
• Parental support on both sides. During trials and tribulations, husbands and wives can expect financial, emotional, and physical support from their parents. When a child is born and the couple has difficulty finding reliable babysitters, it is often the grandparents who pitch in and help care for their grandchild.

Cons:

• Marriages within the bloodline are at higher risk of developing genetic problems, such as Down syndrome, blood diseases, and diabetes.
• There is a possibility of ending up in an unsuitable partner.
• There is an element of risk.
• Romantic love may take longer to develop.
• There is a possibility that women will be dragged off and treated as slaves after marriage.
• Very often, in-laws tend to interfere and meddle in family affairs such as finances, child-rearing, and family obligations.

Always remember that no matter what type of marriage you are in, success in marriage depends on commitment between husbands and wives, communication, and mutual respect.